I knew I should have stayed in bed today.

Last night, I watched two movies, drank two glasses of wine, and then went to bed. Real exciting, eh? I had talked to The Man earlier and he said he was going to try to get a sitter and then we’d go to dinner. I never heard from him, so I figure he couldn’t get a sitter. No big.

This morning, I get up, go to the grocery store first thing because I want to get it out of the way. It’s bloody cold out there! The wind is VERY cold. Anyway, I get my shopping done. In the chip aisle, there are these two heathens who are playing with the chips at their eye level. They bust one of the bags open and chips go everywhere. I wanted to say, “Where is your mother?” But I didn’t. Instead, I grabbed my bag of chips and went on my merry way. Later, I could hear them chasing each other and laughing and carrying on. Running up and down the aisles. Again – where the hell are these kids mother??

Anyway, I get in line. The checkout girl was SLOW. I mean like molasses slow. I wasn’t in any hurry, so no big deal. But for the love of God, she couldn’t even figure out how to ring up produce. Give me a break. Isn’t that you JOB? And don’t they have the little cards there that tell you the code for every item? All the lady in front of me had was cucumbers and oranges. Please.

Oh well. Now. I finally get my new check card in the mail Saturday which is wonderful. HOWEVER, there’s no indication of what my new PIN number is. So I have to use it as a credit card. No big.

So. The girl proceeds to check me out and then talks about almost everything I have unloaded onto the conveyor belt! She even picks up my body wash, looks at it and says, “This is so expensive.” She asks me if I want every large item in a bag – apple juice, dishwasher liquid, milk. Yes, you lazy ass, I want EVERYTHING in a bag. EFF!

Annoyed. Then she has to talk about my chips. SHUT UP AND RING ME UP! I wanted to shout it. I finally get my receipt and I’m outta there.

I realize I forgot shampoo and hamburger buns so I run through Walgreen’s because it’s on the way home. The woman in there acted like it was a total inconvience that she had to check me out. I mean, seriously, folks. I get it’s Sunday morning and it’s bloody cold out, but COME ON.

Later, after lunch, I send a txt message to The Man. He calls a few minutes later, asks me if I got his three he sent last night. I say no. Turns out, he was WAITING at a restaurant FOR ME. EFF. I was so pissed about that. I feel horrible too. He finally manages to get a sitter and then I never get the message. And he’s waiting for me. GAW! I ask him why he didn’t call, he says he couldn’t get a signal. He says he sent messages to two other people and they responded right away. I GOT NOTHING.

Instead I spent the evening watching a movie and drinking wine when I could have had a nice date.

Yeah. I’m pretty effing TICKED.

By Michelle

I wish you all could be inside my head. The conversation is sparkling.