Marathon Beating

Announcement: Talk Dirty To Me is #7 on the Samhain Best Seller List!

What a weekend. I think I need to get back to work so I can rest.

Saturday, the Sweetie Boy and I headed to my brother’s house. The kids played while we recorded Episode 4 of The Collective You. So it’s in the can! Tonight and tomorrow I need to get the blog updated.

We ended up finishing the show around 6:30 and headed off for dinner. But after some mishap with the neighbors and their dogs (they were going with us – the neighbors not the dogs), we ended up heading to the restaurant about an hour later. They met us there a little bit later. We stuffed ourselves silly and then I finally headed home about 10:30. So it was late when we got home. We both crashed.

Sunday we all decided to get up early and head to Ikea because I wanted to get some new living room furniture and Brother wanted to get a bed for Niece #2. We managed to meet up there (it was an hour drive for each of us) within minutes of each other. The plan was to get there early (10:30), get the shopping done and get home. Now, since none of us own a truck, we decided to rent their Enterprise van for $80 a day, unlimited mileage. I had reserved us one on Friday.

We get inside, I check the Sweetie Boy into the play room, we go shop. We pick out everything we want. Back downstairs, I pick up the child, we head to the self-serve furniture area. We get everything on the carts and head to the checkout. We were done and checked out by 11:38. Now, Niece #1 had picked up the Enterprise phone BEFORE we checked out to tell them we were ready to go. They assured us a van was on its way.


We get outside into the 103 heat (thankfully it was in the shade) and wait. And wait. And wait. And wait.

Forty-five minutes later, I get back on the phone with them to find out what the hold up was. I was nice. He told me any minute the van should be arriving.

Back outside, we wait. And wait. And wait.

Now we have three children with us and $1000 worth of furniture just sitting outside waiting for a :censored: van.

I get back on the phone and call again. He tells me the van will be there in five minutes.

I give him ten. Still no van.

Back to the phone. And now I’m pissed. This jackass feeds me some BS about the van being in car prep. Whatever. I say, point blank, “Where are you located because I’m coming to YOU.”

“No, don’t do that,” he says.

I ask for their direct number and he rattles it off fast. If I hadn’t had a pencil ready, I would have never got it down. Now I’m really mad. I say, “What is the ETA of this van?”

He tells me seven minutes. I tell him if this van isn’t here in TEN, I’m calling back and I’m calling every five minutes until it is.

Back outside. It is now TWO AND A HALF HOURS LATER from the time Neice #1 called to get the van on its way.

The van shows up at 1:30. We load up. Brother is hot. I’m hot. We get the furniture loaded and head to the Enterprise place so I can fill out the rental agreement and get the keys and go.

Now, we have to go to my brother’s house which is an hour away, back to my house (another hour), then back to Ikea (another hour) to return the van. :dead: Isn’t this great?

The :censored: Enterprise place is SEVEN minutes from Ikea. So what was the hold up? Who knows. I get inside and that cocky punk-ass is a total condesending jerk. He’s all happy to see me. “You must be Michelle.”

Uh huh. Then he says he’s going to “take care of me” and I say – “YOU’D BETTER.”

So he gets to desk and he asks how he can help me and I look that fer right in the face and say, “No. What are YOU going to do for me?”

His customer service skills were in high gear because his fantastic reply was “Well, what do you want?”

Uh. No. You should be GROVELING at my feet. I made a reservation for this :censored: van and you failed to deliver for TWO AND A HALF HOURS. WTF?

I look right at him and say, “I want this van for free.”

Done. And he was a total ass the entire time. I got his area manager’s name and I WILL be contacting him.

So we all get back in the car, drive to my brother’s unload, eat lunch (at 2:30), then head to my house. We unload and they help me get together my coffee table. It’s time for me to drop off Sweetie Boy, so I do that. Brother head’s home and I head BACK to Ikea with the van because my car is STILL at Ikea. :dead:

I get there, drop off the van and get home at 7:45. I was beat. Beaten down. Hot. Hungry. Thirsty. By the time I ate something, drank a beer, and showered, I fell into bed at 10:15 because I just couldn’t sit/stand another second.

And what did I get out of all this? A really cool new couch, two new chairs, and a new coffee table for less than $700. It ROCKS. 🙂

By Michelle

I wish you all could be inside my head. The conversation is sparkling.