Family Life

The Accidental Designer

July 5, 2022 By Michelle

I haven’t blogged in…forever. I think it’s because I haven’t had much to talk about in my regular life. Regular life being the life of me when I’m not being an author. Ha.

My husband and I moved from our house of 14 years in the fall of 2020–right smack in the middle of the pandemic–into a bigger house about 20 minutes away. We love the house. We’ve been here nearly two years. Not sure what got into me, but one day I looked around and was just sick of all the brown walls and brown floors.

I decided to tackle the dining room first. Now, this is the first time I’ve had an actual dining room in nearly two decades so I was really excited to pick out furniture. The original table and chairs I saw online were brown. The table had this chunky wood base. When we got to the store and I saw it in person, I hated it. I knew it was not the right one.

My husband, though, sometimes knows me better than I know myself and found this lovely set in gray with fabric chairs and a matching server. Here’s a good picture of what it looks like in the dining room. Note the brown (aka boring) wall. The second picture shows the light fixture we replaced. I hated that chandelier.

We found this cool contemporary/elegant light fixture at Home Depot. My husband installed it. I really love it. Ignore the Aerograden on the right. LOL

Anyway, I had been searching for wallpaper for this accent wall but never found anything I liked. I had something specific in mind. Everything I saw did not match my vision. And besides that, I wasn’t sure how my wallpaper skills would be.

I headed over to Pinterest in search of design ideas for accent walls wondering what I could do with paint. I love to paint. I know that’s probably weird for most people but I find it relaxing. I stumbled over these cool walls with these designs on them. In paint! Here is my inspiration photo. Not exactly sure where I found this photo, but I’m sure it was on Pinterest somewhere.

*Inspiration Photo from Royal Design Studio*

I saw this and new instantly this is what I wanted! Now I had to figure out how to do it. Then I found this blog post, which really inspired me!

Who knew this was a stencil? Well, obviously she did. LOL I headed over to Royal Design Studio and picked up the Moorish Trellis to give that wall the Moroccan vibe I wanted. I also bought their stencil paint in Antique Silver.

Once I figured that out, then it was time to pick the wall color. I headed over to Lowe’s and picked up some samples. I chose Valspar Ocean Storm (4004-2B) in eggshell in their Showcase line. It has a lovely sheen that isn’t too harsh and perfect for the dining room.

In progress photo is on the left; finished on the right. You can see how it changes the look and feel of the room by just painting the wall a darker color.

Then it was time to stencil. I watched a lot of videos on how to do it–Royal Design has some great how-to videos on their site. The most important thing was getting started in the right place on the wall. In the center. Which meant I needed help from the husband because I don’t math. LOL

Once we figured out the center, it was go time! I started and moved down the wall. The green tape is the markers for the corners so I know where to put the stencil next.

Then, more stenciling! Moving down the wall and over. The hardest part was the bottom of the wall and the edges. Especially when the ceiling isn’t exactly level.

The key to stenciling is not to have too much paint on the stencil brush. You want to wipe off most of the paint, which is weird to me. But it keeps the paint from bleeding behind the design. When I got to the edges of the wall, it was too difficult to tape the stencil to the wall without it flopping around. That’s when I recruited the husband to help once again.

He measured the space on each end of the wall and we made the executive decision to cut the stencil since I didn’t need the whole thing again. The idea is to make sure you measure precisely and give yourself a little wiggle room to work with. It worked out! I was able to get the edges done faster than wrestling with the large stencil. (Even Royal Design Studio recommends cutting the stencil to fit those hard places and, if budget permits, purchasing a second stencil.)

And then it was done!

The way the light shimmers off the silver paint just makes me happy! And it gives the room the touch of elegance I was looking for without wallpaper! Here are the after photos with the furniture and that wonderful pendant light.

I’m really excited and impressed at how it turned out. I love it so much! All of this was done quite by accident, too (hence the accidental designer). I am not a planner when it comes to decorating. Kinda like how I write my books. ? I found the furniture first, followed by the curtains, then the light fixture and, finally, the wall color.

I am now thinking what I can stencil next! But also trying not to go too crazy because I don’t want to stencil the entire house. Ha!

Social Media Fatigue

May 29, 2018 By Michelle

I had a woman on Facebook tell me how I should be feeding my cat (“use a plate, not a bowl”). It was a comment on a picture of my cat—A FUNNY picture, mind you. I like to share pictures of my cat because he’s fun. When I called her out on it, she called me a bitch and then unfriended and blocked me. So be it. She’s clearly not someone I want to associate with anyway.

However, I’ve been thinking about this a lot. Because it really burns my butt.

Since when did Facebook become the place to tell complete and total strangers how to take care of their pets, live their lives, etc? I guess I don’t understand that type of mentality because I’d never do that to someone else. Especially someone I didn’t know personally. Is it a self-importance thing? Do they think they should police all of social media and push their own agendas on people? It hacks me off. And then I wondered why I was friends with this person anyway. She wasn’t a writer. She was an attorney.

I don’t go to FB to have people tell me how to live my life or feed my cat. I don’t care about your political or religious associations. I have my beliefs. I don’t expect them to align with everyone on the planet. I keep them to myself, like any sane, normal person would. I live by what I was taught: if you don’t have something nice to say, shut your pie hole. Why is this such a hard concept in life? Or have we become a society that lives in a fishbowl for all the world to critique?

At any rate…I think I have social media fatigue. Dealing with people has become a chore. It’s bad enough we have to deal with them in person, but now in the virtual world? It’s exhausting and I’m not sure I have the stamina.

Paying it Forward

October 30, 2017 By Michelle

Recently, a coworker offered me front loading washer and dryer. They were moving into a new house and the W/D came with it and they didn’t want it. The only caveat was we had to pick them up and they lived about 30 minutes away. Really no big deal. From the pictures, they looked like they were in really good shape and practically new. Mine were over a decade old and I knew the dryer was going to die at any minute.

The husband loads up his truck with his moving gear and we head out on beautiful Saturday morning. I showed up with a thank you gift of wine and a restaurant gift card because in my book, it’s just rude to show up empty handed when you’re getting something like that for free.

The pictures didn’t lie—they were in extremely good shape. The dryer was fairly easy to get into the back of the truck and went in first. That was probably our first mistake. The washer weighed about 300 pounds and took four people to load into the back of the truck. This thing was a monster. Oh, I should mention they came with the pedestals already attached, so I’m sure that added to the weight.

So we head home. And because of the load, he took side streets so he wouldn’t have to go 60 mph on the highway. We made it!

And then the issue became, how the bloody hell are we going to get it out of the back? Husband backed into the driveway. He had ATV ramps and attached them to the tailgate, but the problem was the incline. It was a long way down with the washer. He got on one side while I stood in the bed of the pickup. It’s on the dolly. He tells me to push it so he can wheel it down the ramp.

I tried to push. It didn’t budge. He said, “PUSH, honey.” And I said, “I AM PUSHING.”

I finally got it to move and suddenly had visions of my husband being flattened by a 300-pound washer. I stopped.

“NOPE. Not doing it,” I said. I told him I didn’t want to have to explain to the cops I didn’t kill him on purpose by dropping a washer on him. We had a good laugh about that.

It was about lunchtime by then, so while he mulled over how to get the thing out of the truck, I made lunch. We sat on the tailgate and ate a sandwich. I guess tuna was the brain food he needed because he decided to back up to the side of our driveway via our neighbor’s yard (pictured above). It was a much shorter drop, after all. At least if the thing fell off the truck, it wouldn’t have far to go. Ha.

He placed the ramps on the back of the truck. He dragged a piece of old plywood we had in the garage over the ramps and secured with nails.

Now we’re getting somewhere!

He climbs back into the bed of the truck and inches the thing onto the edge of the plywood. We each get on one side and “walk” the thing down the plywood. He was able to use the dolly to roll it into the house. Now that sounds easy, but I had to rearrange the entire house to make room for the behemoth.

The dryer was no big deal after that.

And the old washer/dryer was like picking up a piece of paper and moving it out to the driveway. He did that like it was no big deal.

It took us the rest of the day to get the thing hooked up and working right. The washer needed a significant amount of cleaning before it would work. Apparently, it was dormant for about a year. But with our brains, Google and YouTube, we managed to get everything working properly. In fact, a shout out to Wayne with Sears who taught us how to clean the filter!

In an effort to pay it forward, the neighbor across the street needed a dryer and took ours. A neighbor behind us needed a washer and took our old one. I was very happy the old pair went to two people who really needed it and not someone who just wanted to make a buck.

How to blackmail your #teenager

October 23, 2017 By Michelle

Over the summer, my son and I came to an understanding. He did what I wanted. He’d get to game.

Teenagers aren’t the most cooperative, though. Anyone in the history of the world knows this. We were having a particularly rough battle of wills. This was before school and summer band started in full swing and I was determined to make him a little human. Or at least a little more respectful of his mother.

He’d been spending an inordinate amount of time sleeping and gaming. I wanted to break that cycle.

I told my husband as we were getting ready for bed to change the WiFi password. He stared at me a long moment and then said, “All right.” I think he secretly loved the idea. I should mention my husband delights in coming up with some really creative passwords. The one he came up with was very relevant to the situation at hand. Something along the lines of “be nice to your mother” will well placed special characters.

The next morning, when I got up to get ready for work, I wrote a list of chores I expected the teenager to do before he could get online (see photo). This went over like a lead balloon, let me tell you. The kid was not happy at all, judging by the tone of his texts. Really, if I could have reached through the phone and throttle him, I would have.

He did perform the chores I listed and sent me pictures of all of them. He got the WiFi password.

But his behavior didn’t improve all that much, so we changed it again that night. The next morning, another list went up on the fridge. More chores. I made him earn that password.

By the third day, he had it down. I think (I hope) he learned something from that. He tone was much more respectful. He sent me the proof of his chores without complaint. I claimed that as a small victory.

Being a parent is hard. It’s not a job for the faint of heart. Are there days I want to run away? Sure. But I don’t. I stick it out because the days when you see you have a great kid who finally tells you thank you or hugs you for no reason…that’s when it’s all worth it.

The Revolt of Sir Dexter the #HouseCat

June 27, 2016 By Michelle

clump and seal Dear Arm & Hammer Clump & Seal Litter,

While I’m sure you are a fine product – and I was, in fact, very much looking forward to working with you, I’m afraid I have to remove you from my household.

The problem stems from the revolt of Sir Dexter, who was quite emphatic he wasn’t interested in using your litter. How do I know this, you ask? Allow me to elaborate.

A few weeks ago, I purchased the new 50% lighter and completely dust free litter thinking it would be awesome. I happily replaced the litter in the box with this one from the other brand.

Sir Dexter ignored his box most of the day. He enjoys scratching and pooping in the middle of the night to ensure he will wake up his humans. I think this is his way of paying me back for starving him to death (he’s on a diet). When I got up the following morning to do my daily scooping, I discovered he had not covered his poop and he had peed on the rug.

This was not how I wanted to start the work week.

After putting on a hazmat suit and cleaning up the mess, I headed off to work. By that evening, he had used the box again but failed to cover the offending smell. I also noticed the rug still reeked so I threw it away because I couldn’t stand the smell wafting from the fibers. During the evening hours, a horrible smell cam from the bathroom again. Sir Dexter let me know of his displeasure of the litter by peeing all over the floor.

Sigh.

Another clean up ensued.

Dexter To trick him into using the box, I poured the remaining litter from the other brand on top of this litter. By morning, Sir Dexter had used the box but still failed to cover up the poop. I knew by then he was in full revolt.

Unfortunately, I had to switch by to the other brand of litter, pronto. I made a special stop on the way home for it and switched it out when I got home that evening.

The revolt ended. Sir Dexter, his majesty, was pleased. His human was less than pleased.

Sadly I will not be able to buy your product in the future, Arm & Hammer. I hope you understand.

Love,
Michelle

And My Cat #SirDexter

November 30, 2015 By Michelle

So. A friend of mine posted this hilarious cat video on my Facebook page a while ago. I was in tears, I was laughing so hard. Now, the same day as this was posted, I was telling my husband about the paint fumes at work because a couple of offices were being painted and I jokingly said I was feeling pretty high before I left work that day. THEN I watched this video and thought it was hilarious. I showed my 14 year old son and was weeping again with laughter. He only slightly grinned as much as a 14 year old can do. And then he very stoically asked me, “Mom, are you still high?” Kids, man. Anyway… the video was similar to this one:

So I thought it would be hilarious to try on my cat. Here is the result of that experiment.

Yeah. So that didn’t go as planned. Sir Dexter was NOT amused. Still made me laugh tho.

Parenting and the Dangers of Social Media

May 21, 2014 By Michelle

As a parent, I want to protect my son from everything bad. But I also know I can’t possibly do that when there are so many outside forces surrounding him. School life, friends, social media.

But something happened recently I think all parents of tweens and younger need to know about. People, it is NOT okay to give your young children smartphones. I get you may want them to have a phone to get in touch with you. But does an 8-year-old really need an iPhone? Or even as 12-year-old for that matter? No. And I’ll tell you why.

My son is 12. He’s a little on the young side for his grade (7th). However, he’s very smart and when he was tested to see if he was ready for kindergarten, the school said okay even though his birthday is right on the edge of the cut-off. He’s in AP classes and aside from a little laziness, he’s does really well in school. He’s even overcome some of his more difficult socialization situations. He’s in theater and his first play. He has friends. He’s a very sweet boy.

So when he told me one of his classmates opened a Facebook and Instagram account as him, using a picture of him and spreading lies about him, I was instantly upset. He was very upset as well. As he should be. I found the Instagram account. The profile picture is of my son but it was clearly taken with a cell phone camera during lunch at an angle that clearly shows he didn’t know he was being photographed.

This is highly upsetting to me. For whatever you think about kids and cell phones, there is one thing to remember: they are children. And they don’t need to have that much power in their palms. A camera, access to Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, etc. Access to texting. You can argue with me all day long that some kids need a phone. But there is nothing to convince me children need smartphones. They just don’t. And if they DO have them, then I would hope the parents have some sense of responsibility to teach them the difference between right and wrong.

Clearly the parents of this boy who did this to my son did not have this discussion with him. And that makes me angry. My son does not have a phone. He doesn’t have any social media accounts. I keep a tight rein on that. So I knew this Instagram account was a fake. And I knew I had to take immediate steps to have it taken down.

And that’s another thing. When he told me about the fake account, I immediately went to Instagram’s website. I am HIGHLY annoyed by their website. And all social media sites, to be honest. They make it so damned difficult to find out what to do in cases like this. I couldn’t find it by going to the About page. There is not a Contact Us page. I called on my IT husband to help me find it. Apparently, it’s buried under the FAQs.

This pisses me off, quite frankly. In this day and age when there are so many reports of cyber-bullying and harassment, WHY for the love of God is this information so hard to find? It should be readily apparent on their website. It should be the FIRST thing I see when I hit Contact Us. It should be OBVIOUS. And WHY for the love of God do they make it so damned difficult to have something removed? I have had to fill out TWO forms and the page is still up (as of this writing).

I sent them a strongly worded email again and asked why it had not been removed. This is an underage CHILD and an unauthorized account. It should have been gone within 24 hours of filing the report. Instead, it’s been DAYS. Unacceptable.

I will give them another 48 hours to have it removed. If it isn’t, I will be sending yet another email. To say I’m displeased with how Instagram has handled this situation is a gross understatement. Why should I have to jump through hoops to have this taken care of, Instagram?

I did call the school and talk to the principal about the situation. I’m grateful for administrators who are caring enough to take care of this situation. And they did.

If anything, this has taught my son a valuable lesson in social media. He understands the dangers of it. I hope he understands why I’m so rabid about keeping him off it. When the time comes for him to start his own accounts, you can better believe I will be checking up on him.

Why I should never clean. EVER

January 16, 2014 By Michelle

Now that my book has been released into the wild I can finally do some catch-up blogging.

Hi! How are you? Did you have a nice holiday? Mine was over in a flash. I had the week of Christmas off and it was glorious and wonderful and smashing.

I came home from work on Friday, Dec 20 toting a bunch of little gifts I’d gotten from co-workers. My friend, Diana, gave me a lovely pair of Celtic earrings and a “Merry Christmas” wine glass. I was so excited about these that I put them on immediately and put my silver Brighton earrings on the card. Then I wrapped them in tissue and stuck them in the glass, thinking I would unload everything when I got home.

Well I got home that Friday and was so happy to be off for the next week I must have lost my mind. Husband and I did some final Christmas shopping that weekend and then prepared for Christmas. We decided to clean up the house because my mom was coming for Christmas Eve. Well, there was tissue paper, gift wrap, piles of junk mail, books and magazines stacked on the coffee table. You know, the usual clutter. We cleaned everything up. I unpacked all my gifts from work. Tossed the tissue paper and then put everything else in its place.

Christmas came and went. The Christmas mess with it. My husband is a stickler for recycling so he insisted we recycle all the wrapping paper and most of the tissue paper.

New Year’s Eve. That’s when I realized horror of horrors: when I organized all the little gifts I’d gotten from work, I had taken the tissue out of the wine glass and thrown it in the trash. It was long gone. I knew that. It also had my silver Brighton earrings wrapped in it.

I was sick. I’d had those earrings for years. I LOVED them. They were some of my favorite. So I was sad pretty much all day. I knew they had gone in the trash and the trash had been picked up days prior. I distinctly remember pulling the small square of tissue (not realizing my earrings were in it) and getting rid of it. I knew it was no use digging through the recycle because I hadn’t recycled that particular piece of tissue.

My only saving grace was that Brighton still sold them online! I was shocked. And elated! I immediately ordered another pair…and a new charm for my bracelet. Hey I couldn’t pass that up!

So, henceforth, I shall never again clean. Or at least forget to recycle…

Frozen…Not Just a Movie

December 9, 2013 By Michelle

Where I live in North Texas, we got hit with an ice storm. It came in late Thursday night and stayed with us all weekend. We were literally frozen and stuck at home for 60 plus hours. I’m not even kidding about that.

See when we get stuff like this, everything – and I do mean everything – shuts down. No school. No work. No church. No nothing. School was canceled the night before so I knew I wasn’t going to work the next day. There was no way I was going to even try. When I got up the next morning to see the weather it turned out to be a good decision.

I’m sure most people don’t understand why everything closes down here. It’s because we don’t get snow. We get ice and sleet. It turns the roads into an ice rink and that’s not something I want to drive on. Ever. So we knew we would be homebound for the weekend.

So what did we do cooped up in a 1400-square-foot house for all that time? Lots of different things actually.

Friday was sort of a nothing day but the husband did venture out to the store to pick up a few staples. I made an impromptu stir fry with stuff I had in the freezer. He worked off and on that day while the kid glued himself to the computer or the 3DS.

I braved the cold to take some pictures. Here’s one of the icicles on my lantern in the front garden. I have to admit I’m a little worried about my three rosebushes. I don’t know if they will survive this artic cold. I hope they do. But if they don’t, then I guess we’ll replant something come spring.

On Saturday morning, we got up and cooked a giant breakfast. It felt like Sunday. The roads were worse, meaning everything that came down and was sort of slushy on the roads was now frozen into a sheet of ice. The big trucks were getting stuck on the bridges in downtown Fort Worth. I was so glad I wasn’t out in that mess. Some people were stuck on the Lake Lewisville bridge for over 10 hours because they couldn’t move. I can’t imagine being stuck on a bridge for that long in this frigid weather. How awful for those people.

We did some house cleaning and I did some baking. Since the Christmas decorations were down from the previous week, I started pulling things out to decorate for Christmas. We had intended to buy a real tree but didn’t get it last weekend because the spot for the tree wasn’t ready. I regretted that decision. Hindsight, ya know?

It also gave me some time to read Holly Lisle’s Create a Plot Clinic which I found to be very good. Things have sort of clicked in place for me reading how she creates a plot, especially when she’s stuck. It gave me some more tools I want to try when I’m stuck. Because I’m certainly STUCK on this last book right now. I need all the inspiration I can get.

I also managed to get some crafty stuff done. I bought this glass block from Lowe’s a few weeks ago and some glitter spray paint and ribbon. Then I went to the dollar store and bought some poinsettia and holly stems. After I spray painted it with gold glitter paint, I put white lights inside it, sealed it up and covered it with ribbon. Then I made a pretty little bow and added the poinsettia and holly. And VOILA! Inside cuteness. I think it came out pretty good! It’s really pretty when it’s plugged in and lit up.

Total project cost was about $20. You can’t beat that! And almost all of it came from Lowe’s. I’m going to make another one so I’ll have a set and then they’re going to go up on our entertainment center with some glittery angles in the center and a strand of Christmassy holly. I’m also cross-stitching a small ornament. I’m nearly finished with it. I have two more to do after this and if we’re stuck at home again, I figure it’s a good time to get it done.

We also watched a lot of college football and some hockey. I made chicken soup and beer bread. Husband did laundry. Sunday is more laundry plus we braved the roads for the tree and our weekly groceries. After being stuck in the house for that long, though, we had to get out. Cold or not. Ice or not.

They say Monday and Tuesday are going to be bad too for driving. I will not be driving in this mess. My husband has taken pity on me and will be driving me. Bless his heart.

I know there are those of you who read the blog that live in the same area as me. How did you fare with the treacherous weather? And those of you who live farther north, how about you? Did you make it through the wintery blast?